The Lost Episode

Have you ever wondered how high school popularity shapes our adult selves? Join us as we recount our awe-inspiring, and sometimes intimidating, interactions with the homecoming king whose charisma and thrill-seeking nature left a lasting impression. Fast forward to college, we had an unexpected encounter that transformed our perspective, revealing mutual respect and an unexpected recognition of our career paths. This episode is a heartfelt exploration of the evolution of our desires for social acceptance and how authenticity and self-acceptance become central themes in adulthood.

And what's a late-night chat without some comfort talk? We dive into amusing yet relatable conversations about Tempur-Pedic mattresses and their cozy allure. As we scroll through Twitter, we stumble upon a viral tweet about marriage equality in Minnesota, sparking reflections on personal connections to political events. From family anecdotes like a boss's near-priesthood turned romantic love story to tackling AI's current role and future in creative writing, we keep it candid and conversational. Reflect with us on how popularity, true belonging, and the quest for acceptance shape our lives.

Transcript

High School Popularity

Ben 0:18

When you were in high school, did you ever wish you were popular?

Scott 0:28

Did you ever wish you were popular? I liked the small bits of popularity I got, yeah, but I realized I wasn't playing at the level of. You know, couldn't quite hang. Yeah. Well, let's see the homecoming king. You know, I met like in kindergarten and his dad, like you know, raised him to be the quarterback. Yeah, yeah, yeah. His dad, like you know, raised him to be the quarterback. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he invited steve and I over. Like in that kindergarten year. We were like in the same church too, right same sunday school yeah um.

Scott 1:24

And so his first thing is like here's gonna show I can climb off up this fence and jump off. I'm like, okay, I hadn't had this experience before the five-year-old homecoming king said this, or his dad no, just the, just the kid. His name is Steve too, okay.

Ben 1:47

Steve and Scott, okay.

Scott 1:51

And I don't know. I just yeah, I was like inexperienced with the thrill of throwing your body from a height.

Ben 2:08

But you tried it.

Scott 2:11

I think I did. Yeah, it was just like okay, we're not going to hang, are we?

Ben 2:19

Yeah, yeah. So you realized at a very young age that you weren't quite cut out for the popularity contest.

Scott 2:29

The homecoming.

Ben 2:32

Was that the guy that also turned out to be crazy? I remember you talking about how you was it a. It was a girlfriend you had in high school and at some point you broke up and then she started dating some other guy and then he ended up being like he ended up having some serious mental health struggles later in life. I thought I remember hearing a story about that hmm, might not be about me.

Scott 3:03

Hmm, might not be about me Might be my mom's friends or something.

Ben 3:08

I just I thought I remember you hearing, hearing you at some point talk about like one of my breakups. Oh, you're trying to, you're trying to console me.

Scott 3:20

Something that some somebody else in my life.

Ben 3:26

Yeah, I don't know, I probably had just broken up with my first girlfriend or something, and you were like, yeah, I really thought I was gonna marry this person I dated and was she married someone else? And he turned out to be crazy.

Scott 3:37

So and then he just kind of shrugged I had a girlfriend who turned out to be lesbian, uh but that's, that sounds like it would be a different story.

Ben 3:48

That sounds like a different story. I don't know, maybe I'm misremembering, but different Steve, the homecoming king is entirely unrelated.

Scott 4:00

I got to hang with him once. I got to hang with him once.

Ben 4:05

Later in life.

Scott 4:07

No in college.

Ben 4:10

That's later in life.

Scott 4:12

Yeah, in the dorm.

Ben 4:15

Okay, he went to University of Minnesota too. Yeah, and what was that like?

Scott 4:22

He's a cool guy, you know. Had no reason to ever interact with him again, you know he was like. You know it's probably going into sales, you know or something in that.

Ben 4:43

He wasn't um. He wasn't climbing up tall things and jumping from them anymore.

Scott 4:52

Yeah, he expressed sort of like like like well, you got a cool career, he said to me when you were in college.

Ben 5:05

Yeah, you had a me when you were in college yeah, you had a career when you were in college? Well, I was a computer science oh, got it, got it, yeah, no he was going business. Yeah, okay, his dad trained him to be a quarterback and his dad trained him to be a businessman, right, right, something like that yeah, yeah okay I mean, I just have this.

Scott 5:34

All I remember is the emotion of, of, just like, oh you're, there's something about me that impresses you. I forget the content.

Ben 5:46

He did want to be popular pardon, you cared about, you really cared about what he thought. Even after you graduated, you did say you appreciated the small amount of popularity you got. So yeah, it's we all. We all want to be liked by people that are well liked yeah yeah, yeah, I feel like I would have a similar answer to the question, but sorry, I interrupted.

Scott 6:15

You were saying that you, you were surprised that he, he, uh, he liked what you had yeah, because they didn't, you know, hadn't been in this system of um, it might be real, right, cool I took the picture. I didn't tell you, sorry system hey, yeah, I don't know, interesting, I always thought he was kind of a nice guy, I mean in kindergarten and you know, I mean in kindergarten and you know Onward. Yeah, he was never a jerk. Never a jerk which is like pretty good.

Ben 7:17

That's the thing about like popularity. It's like people are popular for for reasons, and a lot of the time they're like they're the people that are really popular are the ones that are both really cool and just really stand up people but my mind is in protest of that idea.

Scott 7:48

I want to deconstruct who cares about being popular. You know Well you do.

Ben 7:55

You liked it, true? Sorry, I just thought.

Scott 8:07

I have never thought of popularity outside of high school got it, got it, got it, got it.

Ben 8:14

Yeah, nor should we. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Um, I I just came into the, the recording, thinking my brother with the neighbors, I don't know no I don't want to. I don't want to have.

Scott 8:28

You don't want to be popular with the neighbors, and it's just oh, I'm going to be what I am, and if that impacts my popularity, then yeah, okay, yeah, yeah, oh I just I came into the reggae band on the street I mean, yeah, it happened.

Ben 8:47

This podcast is called. That's a Good Question. I'm like, okay, well, I need to ask the question. It's a good way to open things up. You know, when you first, when you start a podcast on your phone, it's like the first sound you hear is very important.

Ben 9:01

We should end the introduction by introducing ourselves, and then we can take a break yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly yeah, but, um, I think I said a few things in there that I don't actually mean I. This all makes it sound like I think about popularity a lot more than I do, but me, of all people, I uh I'm very much like you dad, and that it's uh not something I think about that often. Um, or maybe I do, oh God.

Scott 9:39

Well, maybe I do too, but um you learn to? Yes, we all do. I'm at this cabin in November and no one's.

Ben 9:49

At this cabin, At this cabin. Get this in your head. People Get this image in your head.

Scott 9:55

No one's around. Is it a cabin? Actually, the neighbors are here.

Ben 10:00

In November.

Scott 10:01

The neighbors are here, they came to do their leaves too. My sister told me that I had to do their leaves too. My sister told me that I had to do the leaves.

Ben 10:11

The leaves. You had to do the leaves.

Scott 10:13

We have more than one question.

Ben 10:15

Don't forget to do the leaves. Scott, when are we? What does it mean to do the leaves?

Scott 10:23

We're going to have the introductions at the end of the hour.

Scott 10:25

Is that how this works?

Ben 10:30

Hi, my name is Ben and I'm here with my dad, who's in a cabin in the woods, in November. I'm in a cabin in the woods in November. Welcome to the podcast, everyone. Hi how are you doing? I'm good. I'm not drinking caffeine. I haven't been drinking caffeine for about the last week and a half just under two weeks. Wow, I haven't been sleeping that well for the last couple of years of my life and I'm pulling out the last stop. See what happens um.

Ben 11:32

I slept the most hours of my life last night really, I slept the most hours last night of like probably the last year of my life, but the the most hours of your entire life. Last night, how long did you sleep? What do you attribute this to?

Scott 11:54

This is like winter to me. I don't know Everyone's gone. I didn't even want to go out last night. It's. Saturday night and you didn't.

Ben 12:11

You didn't even feel like partying no yeah, yeah what time do you? Go to bed. What time do you wake up?

Scott 12:22

I'm to sleep in that really hard temper pedic that we bought oh, so when you and mom share, yep yeah because, it's not on the bandwagon and it's really hard and it especially when it cold. It gets harder when it's colder. Yeah, You're sitting on this thing that feels like a soft stone that keeps sinking beneath you.

Ben 12:56

Soft stone Approaching uncomfortability. That's Tempur-Pedic Brought to rising by tempur-pedic. Everyone like sleeping on a soft stone and it works. It works well. You said you slept more hours last night than you have in your entire life yeah um. So there must be something to be said about sleeping on soft stones yeah, maybe get them as an advertiser whichever, yeah, we could do that, we could do that. Could, do that, the Purple Boys could be our arch nemeses. Ever seen the Purple Boys?

Scott 14:02

No, they make mattresses.

Ben 14:04

No, they, it's uh, tim and eric. Um, the comedians they have, uh, they used to have commercial for I I can't remember if the company is is purple, if they're but they they did commercials for and they were just super unhinged, but I think it worked. It got me thinking differently about my mattress. What time did you go to bed?

Scott 14:35

Oh, this is a question. Oh, about what time did I go to bed? Nine, I suppose, no eight. It gets dark so early here.

Ben 14:49

Yeah, yeah, I think we're at a similar latitude. It's like 445. It's pretty dark here, yeah Right, what time did you wake up?

Scott 15:00

Nine something. Wow For the last time.

Ben 15:04

I mean, you know, did you get up at all in the middle of the night? Sure.

Scott 15:09

I get up on twitter until I go back back.

Ben 15:14

I longer last night than I have in my entire life and I woke up in the middle of the night to check Twitter. Wow.

Scott 15:32

It's, like, you know, kind of being an amateur journalist. I know I'm going to pay you.

Ben 15:40

Crawling through Twitter makes you an amateur journalist.

Scott 15:44

Well, it certainly makes me an amateur journalist.

Ben 15:48

I think with that kind of power comes much more responsibility than pretty much anyone who uses Twitter deserves. Oh Sorry, that's not true, I'm not asking for that. It's like asking to like have relevant comedy you know, it's just like no I'm gonna say what's funny to me um, I see, I see, so you share on twitter. You Twitter, you're not just a passive scroller. No, I got it.

Scott 16:24

You share your character-age. A lot of things with no response from anybody.

Ben 16:30

Yeah, just like.

Scott 16:31

You could look if you wanted.

Ben 16:34

Yeah, I don't. I don't have the desire to sign up for that website, especially nowadays.

Scott 16:43

But if I mailed you a list of my tweets, you'd look at them.

Ben 16:47

Yeah, yeah, I would Definitely so they're highly consumables, highly consumable.

Scott 17:01

Yeah, I read back on my tweet history and I go, oh, that's smart, that's smart, oh cool. It's like all good material and I should just before I have to pay for it, I should go download it.

Ben 17:15

How often do you go viral? Once.

Scott 17:22

Oh, oh yeah, what was it?

Ben 17:24

once. Oh yeah, what was it?

Scott 17:30

talking about visiting my mom just before marriage equality got passed in Minnesota and now seeing her boss like on TV that day and him going against it as a Democrat, which was surprising and uh-huh yeah, so you just shared, kind of, you just shared a recollection of that no, it was like a day the day after it passed in Minnesota oh good it was like, like, like, like. Like you know, it was like yeah, I mean something about her connection to the Capitol and everything was in the tweet.

Ben 18:27

Yeah right.

Scott 18:29

Yeah, okay, well, that is a good story. That is like a.

Ben 18:35

Tell the story in a few words.

Scott 18:38

Well, yeah, okay, okay, I got a story for after the podcast. I'll tell you oh, okay, okay, okay, I got a story for after the podcast.

Ben 18:50

I'll tell you oh man, you got to edit, you know. You're really depriving the people here, man. Yeah, they're at the edge of their seats waiting to hear yeah, yeah, so your mom, so you're saying her boss you're. So how old would grandma mj be? Right now she would be 30 more than me 30 more than me. That's like 94.

Scott 19:26

She'd be 94.

Ben 19:26

She was alive, She'd be 94. So you're saying when did marriage equality pass in Minnesota?

Scott 19:40

I think 2016, but I might be off one way or the other.

Ben 19:46

Her boss? Is he still working for the state?

Scott 19:53

He was a senator.

Ben 19:55

Yeah, okay.

Scott 19:56

He kept on being a senator Okay.

Ben 19:59

So he retired from his gig.

Scott 20:02

Yeah.

Ben 20:02

The gig in which he was grandma's boss. Yeah, and he continued to be a senator. Okay, got it, got it, got it. So just an old white dude as a Democrat coming to say grumpy and he was a priest candidate. Priest candidate.

Scott 20:28

Yeah, he had signed up to become a Catholic priest. Okay. And he bailed because he fell in love.

Ben 20:36

Uh-huh, yeah, yeah, with someone his own age.

Scott 20:41

With a female too. But I mean, he had this history of, you know, thinking out of the box.

Ben 20:55

I almost became a Catholic priest. I think outside the box.

Scott 21:04

I just expected more from him, yeah.

Ben 21:10

Yeah, yeah, okay, yeah. Well, sometimes you go.

Scott 21:18

I think, I think, I think, yeah, he was, he was, he was a, he was a good guy, Um, um with yeah, not everyone's clear of the mindset of the.

Ben 21:38

Catholic church.

Scott 21:42

Catholic church oh, got it, got it, got it, yeah. Catholic church yeah, a whole bunch of things to uh the way jesus wanted us to be yeah, sorry, you said the catholic church.

Ben 21:58

What about the way? Way Jesus wanted us to be?

Scott 22:08

I'm kind of like I want you know raw Jesus. You know not raw Jesus, not yet yeah. Raw, not all that stuff added on, all right.

Ben 22:20

What a choice of words. God wants raw Jesus. I know what you mean. I know what you mean Better than you and I mean, yes, yeah, I mean that's kind of. Original.

Scott 22:34

Original.

Ben 22:34

Yeah Right, I mean, yeah, it's the thing about institutions Comes great power comes great responsibility. You haven't done a very good job. I don't think that the thought of that man impacted the Roman. Empire. You do think the thought of that man impacted the Roman Empire.

Scott 23:01

I think the EU would be what it is without the thought of that man impacting the Roman Empire. Wow, this is really deep what.

Ben 23:13

Wait, you do think the EU would have been the same with or without I think the thought of Jesus, not I mean.

Scott 23:24

The Roman Empire conquered the Christians right.

Ben 23:28

Yeah, right, well, at the first, when they first started bubbling up. Yeah.

Scott 23:34

Uh-huh. Then they melded yeah, it was like the power structure didn't go away. Have you been to the Vatican power?

Ben 23:48

well, that's that's. The thing is that it's. Jesus was very, very critical of the powers that be, and then the powers that be couldn't, couldn't, defeat him. So and his ideas? So they became him and his ideas. So they became him and his ideas and then used it to enrich and you know, we have what we have now because of it. So what do you mean? This is deep. This is just a way of things. This is this, this is it's. It's just the way of things. Someone with a lot of spirit comes through and inspires everybody, culture is completely changed, and then the institutions commandeer it and then it becomes rigid and constricting and actually really, really harmful and totally out of sync with what the original intention was. Yeah, wow, I think it's, yeah's, wow, yeah, it's a pattern. That just happened.

Scott 24:48

Can I put all that on a bumper sticker?

Ben 24:51

uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, it'd be. Uh, you know, I got 11 by 17 bumper sticker. Go for it. No other way to narrow it down, I don't know.

Scott 25:05

Just get a jesus fish with legs oh, I've been using chat gpt and lately we've been working together can I put that on a bumper sticker?

Ben 25:20

I've been using chat GPT. Is it GPT or BT?

Scott 25:27

P. P as in Peter, p as in Peter.

Ben 25:34

Okay.

Scott 25:34

Anyway yeah. And I'm working on a historical novel of a chance meeting.

Ben 25:50

Sorry, okay, I need to put that on a bumper sticker. I've been using chat GBT. Put it on the other side. I'm working on a historical novel. Okay, yeah, okay, I'm with you. Sure, you're really. Wow. Talk about chop wood, carry water.

Ben 26:18

Just let the computer do it no, it helps a lot, is like would there ever been a chance that you know who dread scott is uh, who's got red scott, dread scott yeah I only know the name from the dread scott decision and learning about it in high school and just knowing that that exists but having no idea what it was a slave who was brought to Minnesota okay.

Scott 26:51

I had a case, you know, because of that yeah and so like did Dred Scott ever meet Henry Sibley and or little crow? Or maybe they all met in the 18th?

Ben 27:09

Uh-huh.

Scott 27:12

No one knows. They didn't. They were all at the same place, same time.

Ben 27:19

Right, uh-huh. So you're you. You are harnessing the powers of artificial intelligence to get to the bottom of it, and and I'm adding intelligence to get to the bottom of it.

Scott 27:31

And and I'm adding Lincoln and Darwin to the story Lincoln is an obvious connection, right?

Ben 27:41

Right, right. Yeah, you know, never meet those four slash five characters.

Scott 27:49

No, he was like in South Americaica, but in the pacific. You know, yeah, right during these years, english man with the button nose in the pacific um, lincoln was actually fighting the blackhawk during these years, like in in Wisconsin, or you know.

Ben 28:11

Like actually fighting, like on the ground.

Scott 28:15

Putting together a military force and going out and see if they could find a fight, and they didn't, which is kind of the same thing Sibley did.

Ben 28:26

Sibley, is he the one that the is your high school named after him?

Scott 28:31

Yeah, he rounded the largest mass, the people for the largest mass execution as a general of the US Army.

Ben 28:44

Yeah, why do you want to know if some of these colonists and imperialists hung out with Dred Scott?

Scott 28:57

and Little Crow yeah no only. Oh okay, who else who?

Ben 29:13

are you adding? I'm? I'm sorry, I'm not trying to add anyone. I'm wondering like why? So dred scott shows up in minnesota, henry sibley is doing his colonist thing and abraham lincoln's in wisconsin doing his colonist thing, and and abraham lincoln's in wisconsin doing his colonist thing and um are you trying to write a novel?

Scott 29:44

no, it's interesting. There's the. There's the person who came there, uh, on their own will. There's the person who came there not on their own will uh-huh yeah yeah, the person who was there, you know, yeah, right yeah, you know okay, each is history makers of the time. Yeah.

Ben 30:15

Yeah, how, how long does?

Scott 30:19

interact as humans would be interesting in a story.

Ben 30:23

Yeah, it definitely would. So kind of like historical fiction is what you're putting together.

Scott 30:31

Yeah, yeah, so kind of like historical fiction is what you're putting together. Yeah, yeah, okay, imagining things that are possible but not documented.

Ben 30:42

Right, right, yep, yep, yep.

Scott 30:46

I mean somebody met. I mean simply, after his European wife died, married a native.

Ben 30:59

Yeah.

Scott 31:02

Brain. Figure it out in a moment. I don't know the name Top of my tip of my tongue. Figure it out in a moment. I don't know the name Top of my tip of my tongue.

Ben 31:15

Well, when the AI gets that story together.

Scott 31:20

Well, I wouldn't write it without confirming the things it says, because it makes up stuff.

Ben 31:29

Oh my god.

Scott 31:31

It does.

Ben 31:33

You know that, don't you? I encourage you to think of what your end goal is for letting this piece of computing let loose on this topic.

Scott 31:48

No, it's really just like a convenient thing to. It's like talking to a friend who knows a lot but doesn't know everything you know okay and just fills in the blanks with whatever the fuck you think. So yeah, okay that's what it is very constructive wow, okay, so long as you know ask it to like lay out a whole thing, and it'll give you, like chapter by chapter, what you should.

Ben 32:19

Oh yeah, oh yeah. Oh. I know, but it can't make people laugh very easily. We've talked about that before. It's not good at making people laugh. No. No.

Scott 32:34

No no. Elaborate. Yeah, right, yeah, it might get better, who knows.

Ben 32:45

We'll see. I hope it does not get better, but it probably will. Probably will. All right, we got a minute and 15 seconds.

Scott 32:57

What was the original question? Oh, what do you feel about being popular?

Ben 33:02

Did you ever want to be popular in high school? That was the question, and I mean, I think, for a lot of us, me included to impress women. Yes, yes, sorry, yeah, sure, okay. I mean, that's always, it's always an element of the whole popularity thing, but it does not tell the whole story. We just want belonging. We just want belonging, and I think at some point in our lives we realize that the popularity contest isn't actually the route towards true belonging.

Scott 33:41

I didn't really want to agree. Though I didn't really want to agree, I was like the perfect candidate to take off to the city.

Ben 33:52

You know To be homecoming king, you were the perfect candidate to take off to the city. You know To be homecoming king, you were the perfect candidate.

Scott 33:58

No, no, You're first folks, no, no no, you're ending on Bye.